It is hard to believe that this trip, which I began praying about last December, is only 6 weeks away. But God has already been teaching me so much and I'm excited to get on the road (or in the air). :)
One of the biggest things He has been showing me these past couple months as I have prepared is the idea of self-sacrifice. What does it truly mean to deny yourself and take up the cross in this self-seeking world? (Matt 16:24-28) I felt God calling me to have a complete attitude makeover. How often are we thinking about our own goals and plans rather than God's? How often do I choose to pursue my wants over spending time with my Saviour?
Oswald Chambers, brings up the same idea and talks about the verse in Gal 2:20,"I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me" and gives the thought, "The passion of Christianity is that I deliberately sign away my own rights and become a bond-slave of Jesus Christ." This comment hit me pretty hard. "Sign away my own rights"- am I really capable of surrendering ALL to Christ in this way? I felt like all I did this fall was think about myself- I tried to find a job-tried to save money-tried to figure out what my purpose was in the "real world". I was constantly making plans, and though I was praying for God to be involved in it all, I feel I was only tacking Him onto what I was doing instead of having Faith and allowing God to show me HIS plans.
So I have wrestled with this idea of self-sacrifice and realized I need to make a decision each day to pursue Him first and foremost and allow Him to make my dreams/plans. I know I have only scratched the surface of "crucifying" my independence, but Psalm 25: 4-5 has become my prayer each day and as I enter into these 6 months of service and learning-I pray that God will continue to show me how to truly give up myself and center my life around HIM!
May our hearts truly proclaim this song's message-"Glory to God-Glory to God Forever. Take my life and let it be, all for you and for your glory-Take my life and let it be YOURS!"
Thank you for all your prayers in support-I look foward to keeping in touch along the journey!